The first time I heard that forgiveness was not an “action” but a “process,” my first reaction was complete astonishment!

Being the rational person that I am, I began to question: How was it possible? How could it be a process? I had heard and learned all my life that forgiveness was an action and then, all of a sudden, forgiveness becomes a process!

Then I realized that I had received a subtle and precious key which could open a new dimensional door to understand a world of feelings and deep emotions. Now my perception was not 2D anymore; it became 3D!! And the most important lesson was to accept that I cannot control the world around me. And by trying to do so, I was perceiving the world as a “binary” system in which there is only yes and no, black and white, right and wrong, love and hate. What a surprise it was for me to realize that real life shows us in a very practical way that feelings and deep emotions possess many different dimensions which work as a spiral with me getting lost in its curves!!

For the first time I really understood why there is a popular saying about time being a great master. Only by maturing can I accept that nothing happens by chance, that the outside world is a real mirror, and that, most of the time, I do not like what is reflected back to me. But in rejecting the image of my flaws, my weakness, my endless neediness, and the fantasy that pushes me seek out another to make me feel whole, I eventually realize that that fantasy will never come true. And I become aware of this first complex dimension of resentment which my frustration creates.

That is where the first step in the process of forgiveness begins: the awareness and understanding of the immensity of resentment!!